Simplifying Shadow Work: How to Transmute Your Darkness to Light and Tap into Your Pure Potential
"The dark cave you most fear to enter holds the treasure you seek."
William Campbell
'
Shadow Work' is a buzzword in many psychospiritual and personal development circles. But what does it really mean?
Dr. Carl Jung coined the term Shadow to refer to the area of our minds that is outside the "Light" of our awareness- the Unconscious. Our Shadow is typically formed during childhood through experiences, conditioning, and societal influences.
The Shadow is something we all have, yet so many people do not take time to examine or understand it. As such, it remains a highly mysterious and misunderstood concept, which is only to our own demise.
Your Shadow is the estranged, hidden part of you craving to be explored. It holds the key to our greatest potential.
Uncovering the Shadow
First, what your shadow is NOT. It's not
the worst or weakest parts of ourselves
the ways we are incomplete or inadequate
something that is wrong with you
something in need of "fixing'
Your shadow IS, however:
the innate /built-in but neglected or rejected parts of you
the estranged, hidden parts of your unconscious
the previously unexamined, concealed aspects of yourself
our estranged self
the part of us craving to be explored
our hidden potential
the destructive nature within
the perceptions you have about the wounded, dirty or dark parts of you
our repressed life energies
our untapped potential and creativity
our light, our potential and our POWER.
"The shadow should not be equated with evil, only with life that has been suppressed. As such, the shadow is rich in potential. Becoming conscious of it makes us more fully human, more interesting. A shadowless person is extraordinarily bland and uninteresting. A willingness to allow our darkest impulses, as well as repressed creativity, to surface and be acknowledged is a step toward their integration. Negative shadow contents such as rage, lust, anger, etc., can be destructive when acted out unconsciously, but when consciously acknowledged and channeled they can provide new directions and new energy.
In concrete terms, the shadow will out, whether in unconscious acts, projections onto others, depression or somatic illness. The shadow embodies all the life which has not been allowed expression. It embodies all lost sensitivity, which denied, breaks through in sentimentality. It represents our creativity, which abandoned, locks us into ennui and enervation. It embodies our spontaneity, which suppressed, routinizes and stultifies our lives. It represents a life force greater than our conscious personality has yet utilized, and its blocking leads to diminished vitality.
James Hollis
Shadow Work is the process of bringing the Shadow into your awareness. It is about being gentle with your inner being through
SELF-ACCEPTANCE
SELF-LOVE
SELF-COMPASSION.
SELF-HEALING
From there we can achieve Self Actualization, growing into our full potential.
Shadow Work is the ultimate human vulnerability. And despite popular belief, it is not a one-and-done event. It is an ongoing, even life-long journey of digging deeper into our identity, learning and unlearning our patterns and removing our deep conditioning from the past.
Shadow Work is essentially about loving, accepting and reparenting your hidden inner child. This isn't easy because it goes against our training, our conditioning or culture. All our lives we've been told how we should be instead of how to be simply ourselves. We fail to realize that we are pure and perfect exactly as we are born.
Thankfully, Shadow Work gets easier over time as we become more familiar with its discomfort.
“Loving everything about yourself – even the ‘unacceptable’ – is an act of personal power. It is the beginning of healing.”
Christiane Northrup, M.D.
A Dark Night
The 'Dark Night of the Soul' is a phrase describing a sinister spiritual awakening of your Shadow self. It is when there is a liberation of your soul, usually coinciding with painful, life-altering emotional experiences such as death, illness, breakups or any unexpected or unmanageable incident which leads to a complete loss of familiarity, identity or stability.
During these times, our perceived realities experience a total paradigm shift as we experience a wide range of negative, uncomfortable emotions:
Shock and Confusion
Depression, Grief and Loss
Disconnection and self-Isolation
Deep Reflection, Questioning & Analysis
Soul Searching
Profound Realizations
Re-Birth & Awakening
"“The dark night of the soul is when you have lost the flavor of life but have not yet gained the fullness of divinity. So it is that we must weather that dark time, the period of transformation when what is familiar has been taken away and the new richness is not yet ours.”
Ram Dass
Many healers and lightworkers prefer to think of the Dark Night as a form of divine intervention, completely beyond our limited human knowledge and understanding. To those around us, we may appear "normal" and ourselves, but on the inside we are both simultaneously suffering... and deeply transforming.
In these times, we may finally acknowledge and accept the Shadow. This can feel more like a living, terrifying torture as we are forced to
Destroy rigid and outdated patterns.
Release attachments or compulsions
Shed parts of our self-identity
Witness the "death" of our ego
If you are going through your Dark Night, try to trust in the process and timeline. Remember, you are strong enough to endure the hardship and withstand the winds of change.
The sun eventually rises, and when it does you'll see that we are all living a higher plan which is vital for our own evolution, and in the journey of those lives we touch.
Although nearly impossible to see when you're in it, a Dark Night is almost always very beneficial and rewarding in the end. In hindsight you'll often look back to realize that moving on after a Dark Night means that you finally begin to feel
Empowered to live and love more freely.
A understanding of your heart's true desire
A conscious connection with the SOUL and SOURCE of who you are
Unconditional love for self and others
"When the Ego weeps for what it has lost, the Spirit rejoices for what it has found"
Sufi
Light vs Dark
Within every Light and Dark entity, there is a further breakdown of yin/feminine and yang/masculine energy within.
Your Light is Your...
Strengths
Gifts
Competencies
Talents
Assets
Offerings
Your Shadow is Your...
Darkness
Dirtiness
Scars
Wounds
Weaknesses
Flaws
Inadequacies
This work is about embracing the fullest, WHOLE self, inside and out -
good and bad
yin and yang
masculine and feminine
light and dark
wounds/losses/unfulfilled desires
joys/successes/blessings
ALL of it is equally valuable!
It is simply about harmony and BALANCE between two opposing forces
Separating vs Uniting
Releasing vs Embracing
Tuning in vs Silencing
Tending vs Clearing
Breaking patterns
Removing blockages
Acknowledging triggers
Healing traumas
Knowing your worth
True self-love and acceptance means celebrating your light while honoring your dark. They are all in perfect order! So why not simply embrace your Shadow, just as you do your Light?
"First you wake up to your Light. Then you wake up to your Shadow. Then you wake up to your Self."
Dolores Cannon
Integrating the WHOLE Self
We're all ONE in accordance to universal spiritual laws, This means that every person carries all traits within themselves, even if they aren't expressed outwardly.
Wholeness is an innate, natural destiny for humans and, as a result, the subconscious will continually try to do whatever's needed to integrate fully.
We all have aspects of ourselves that we want to deny and push away out of fear. When we examine and acknowledge that fear or insecurity, we may find that a part of us is ready to learn more about who we are. The more we can acknowledge the way we truly feel, while not reacting by clinging or resisting, the more we can release it and respond to triggers with neutrality.
You may have heard the philosophy that the qualities you most dislike in yourself will be the ones that we are most triggered by in others. This is because our unconscious mind, completely without our knowing, will project these traits outwardly to those around us, which inevitably results in frustration, disappointment and resentment.
Unfortunately, and surprisingly, when we do not like a certain quality in ourselves, that actually gives that quality MORE power than if we were to simply accept and own it.
"Your discomfort is where your work is."
John Assaref
Seeing Clearly
With the world shifting into a higher vibration, many people are now starting to get glimpses of their own Shadow for the first time in their lives. Whether or not you will evolve towards your Higher Self will depend upon this work and the integration of your shadow.
You're bound to meet your darkest demons and this is why so many people fear the process of Shadow Work. They fear finding out who they are beneath it all. They fear finding out that they are exactly like the people they can not stand the most. They fear gazing at their reflection and all of its harsh truths. The key is to push forward and allow yourself to evolve through the discomfort.
As healers, energy workers and light workers it is impossible to work from alignment and truth if we are fragmented within ourselves. It can seem really tempting to keep our attention only on the qualities of ourselves that we like or that we feel are “spiritual” enough. We can feel tempted to resist the parts of our personality that cause us to feel triggered, angry, sad, worried or fearful and to cling to the aspects of ourselves that feel happy. We may not want to admit that we get caught in judgement of others or that certain situations are overwhelming or unpleasant to us.
It is a trap to believe that being a spiritual person means that we don’t have any darkness or that we are supposed to pretend we are perfect or superhuman. When we don’t acknowledge the aspects of ourselves that we reject or that we are ashamed of, we are not able to find complete acceptance. We are not able to fully see our own Higher Self and the Divine working through us, because we continue to believe we are separate and unworthy of being whole. We can only go so far on our healing path without truly looking within ourselves and examining the parts of ourselves we judge.
"Don't Escape, EXPRESS. Don't Deny, ACCEPT."
Release to Rise
Habitual thoughts and patterned behaviors are the foundation of our everyday lives, building the daily practices and routines that shape us consciously and subconsciously. Our healthy habits are healthy and productive, supporting us as we move toward our goals, while our toxic ones, part of our Shadows, hold us back and undermine our ability to achieve and succeed. For so many of us, our programming is faulty and desperately needs an update.
Every single time something really bothers you about someone it is actually a reflection of the beliefs you hold about yourself that are not in alignment with the truth of who you are.
When this happens, we have a choice: We can give our power away to the situation and feel helpless, powerless OR we can use it as an opportunity to get closer to ourselves.
This work can be very triggering for our Ego. If we are creating our own reality then we have control and can CHOOSE what we believe about ourselves, how we treat ourselves, how we define ourselves. From there, new people and opportunities will come into our lives that are an energetic match to who we truly are.
"No tree, it is said, can grow to heaven until it's roots reach down to hell."
Carl Jung
Below are the most common psychological, ego-protecting, control-keeping habits that get in our way of success:
Self-Abandonment - Not following intuition, truth or heart's, not living authentically
Self-Silencing - ignoring intuition, overvaluing input opinions of others
Self-Destruction - causing harm or neglect to self in short-term or long term
Self- Sabotage - making choices that do not seize full opportunities
Self- Criticism - engaging in poor self-talk
Self-Pity - victim mindset, blame shifting
Shadow Work can help you release, unlearn and overcome ALL of these emotional and mental patterns, one by one. It simply takes awareness. mindfulness, time, and patience.
"Unless you learn to face your own darkness, you will continue to see it in others. Because the world outside of you is only a reflection of the world inside you."
Shadow Work & Manifestation
Shadow Work and the Law of Attraction are intimately connected. This is because both require
Being aware of negative mental patterns
Processing repressed emotions
Healing scarcity, lack or victim mindset
Raising your vibration to attract more of what you want
Evolving as a spiritual and energetic being
Everything you desire is already on its way to you. The question is… Are you completely open to receiving it? You may think you are, but your energy field and subconscious are not.
If you want to become a quantum creator then you will need to embrace the daily challenge/ practice/ process of becoming your Highest Self. And to get there you'll first need to "clear your crap", which is all of the energetic clutter, attachments, restrictions, baggage and weight which holds us back from welcoming new changes in our lives.
It's imperative to make space in your life, and your self, so that the new energy can come in. Get ready to completely let go of anything that doesn't support you being/ becoming your best self! This is your much-needed vibrational DETOX so that you can become the freest, happiest, safest, and most beautiful version of you.
In order to create balance there must be a palpable movement or exchange of energy (time, attention, information, etc). After all, it is a universal law of nature that energy can't be created or destroyed, only transferred to a different form
Your ability to manifest is a product of your energetic frequency, which is determined by your PAST experiences and your CURRENT mindset and lifestyle choices. Embodying, sharing and spreading positive and uplifting energy is how we elevate our vibration!
Practicing Shadow Work is one of the most important and healing steps in manifesting your dreams and desires. In order to access your Spirit Self you must first claim your lower, ego self. And then you must LOVE that being will all your power.
Manifesting happens in the dark and alignment happens in the light. Everything is created in the dark void, it is only brought to the physical when it hits the light… The darkness can be an uncomfortable place if you are unaware of the power that it holds. It is often suppressed and because of this people tend to misunderstand it, so they put their focus primarily on the light…but remember nothing would exist without the dark. The light was birthed in the darkness…
Self-Illumination & Self-Healing
By acknowledging and shining a light on our shadows, we can:
Embrace authenticity, recognizing that we are not just the positive traits we celebrate but also the negative ones we might dislike. By accepting and integrating all aspects of ourselves, we become more whole and authentic individuals.
Confront and heal unresolved emotional wounds from the past can influence our present behavior and decision-making.
Break repetitive patterns in our relationships, careers, finances or other areas. and break free from harmful cycles.
Enhance relationships through increased empathy and compassion for others, recognizing that everyone has their own struggles and challenges.
Develop emotional intelligence by fostering a deeper understanding of our emotions and how they influence our thoughts and actions.
Take responsibility for our responses and reactions. We become less reactive and more intentional and empowered in our choices.
Gain a better understanding of our motivations and desires.
Release negative emotions and find inner peace.
The point of this work is not to justify or to cling to your thoughts and emotions, but simply to observe what is happening within you in a non-judgmental way.
Remember that Shadow Work can be challenging and may bring up difficult emotions, so it's important to take care of yourself and seek support if needed.
Below are several shadow work practices to try on your journey. The next time you are triggered or feeling emotional extremes you can also practice shadow work in the moment to calm your nervous system.
"We have to own the Shadow we carry, een though it's not really us at all"
Richard Rudd
JOURNALING & REFLECTION
Explore the following prompts for inspiration and insight.
PRESENT
What are your core values, truths and passions?
What dont I like about myself? Where or when did I learn the things about me are bad?
Who do I idolize and place on a pedestal?
Where do I need to assert myself more?
What areas of myself do I want to build upon for strength and stability?
What are your insecurities? What do you not like about yourself? What parts of yourself do you hide away, repress or deny from other people for shame?
What are the most common misconceptions or misunderstandings about you?
What do you fear would happen if others saw the very worst of you?
What triggers, bothers, angers or annoys you ? Why?
Are there any positives to those traits?
How might you be similar to someone you intensely dislike?
What experiences regress me back to my younger self?
What experiences lead me to dissociate and escape from reality?
What unhealthy habits are preventing or distracting you from your highest potential?
What healthy attachments bring me comfort and stability?
What addictive patterns do you have?
What are you feeling currently?
What emotions do I try to avoid and why? How do you avoid feeling your feelings?
What would happen if you accepted and felt your feelings deeply?
What are your pain points?
What areas of your life feel dissatisfying or discontenting?
What aspects of myself do I impose or project onto others?
What experiences make me polarize my thinking into black or white?
How do I punish myself when I make mistakes?
What am I most insecure about and why?
How do I treat myself when I don't well?
When do I feel loneliest or most hopeless?
PAST
Have you ever experienced a time in life where you felt totally alone and abandoned by God/Divinity? If so, what inner/outer spiritual resources did you draw upon to find the light again
What did you learn or how did you grow from such an experience?
What do I need to forgive myself for?
How can you give yourself what you didnt receive as a child: (attention affection, love recognition, appreciation)?
What negative family patterns might you be repeating?
FUTURE
What do you need to work on to improve?
What opportunities await you?
What do you want out of life, and why? How do you want to feel?
Why do you NOT want that for yourself?
What does my Future Self do differently than the current version of me?
"If you don't sit with your Shadow then you can't sand in your Light."
CHAKRAS
What can you uncover in each energy center of your body?
ROOT Chakra
How do you unintentionally allow others to invade your personal boundaries?
What traumas have you inherited from your ancestors?
When you think about the word “family,” what feelings, emotions, memories, and thoughts arise (both good and bad)? How might that understanding of family impact who you are today?
Do you trust yourself? Do you trust others? Do you trust life? Why or why not?
SACRAL Chakra
What is your relationship like with your sexuality?
Reflect on any personal habits that make you feel guilty. Why do they stir this emotion within you? What toxic core belief or judgment is going on behind the scenes?
Notice how the following statement makes you feel: “I deserve pleasure in my life.” How do these words sit with you?
Do you veer towards hedonism or asceticism? Why? What scares you about the opposite quality?
SOLAR PLEXUS Chakra
What makes you feel ashamed of yourself? Why?
If you have a gentle personality, what scares you about anger? If you have a rough personality, what scares you about softening up and letting go?
Imagine holding a ball of fire in your hand. If you could set something (or someone) on fire without fear of consequence, who/what would it be? Why?
In your most dark moments, what makes you feel empty and unworthy?
HEART Chakra
Deep down, do you feel worthy of true love? Why/why not?
What were you taught about giving and receiving love as a child?
What quality within you do you have the most trouble accepting?
In relationships with others, what is your biggest flaw?
THROAT Chakra
What is the biggest lie you’ve ever told?
If you were to write in the voice of your inner critic right now, what would it say to you?
Notice how the following statement makes you feel: “I deserve to speak up and be listened to.” How do these words sit with you?
Were you listened to as a child?
What is your biggest criticism of other people? How might this criticism apply to you as well?
THIRD EYE Chakra
When was the last time you realized you were deluded or believed something false? What was that experience like for you?
What might you be in denial about right now?
Name an area in life where you’re seeing in black or white (e.g, good or bad, right or wrong, spiritual or unspiritual, nice or nasty). What shades of grey are you missing?
In what ways do you mistrust your intuition?
CROWN Chakra
In what areas of life do you struggle to think for yourself?
What kind of spiritual abuse (if any) did you experience growing up? How has that impacted the way you perceive yourself, others, and life?
What part of your current belief system do you have a hard time believing or trusting? How might this be beneficial and/or harmful to you?
How might you be spiritually bypassing your everyday human problems?
"The portal to every next level is through the parts of yourself that you avoid"
the Universe
CREATIVE EXPRESSION
ILLUSTRATE and draw various parts of yourself
Child self. What past experiences caused pain or suffering. what part of the body is it held?
Higher self. How do you perceive yourself?
Shadow self. How do you perceive yourself?
Environment. How do you see the world around you?
Fears, Anxieties. What makes you go into fight, flight, or freeze or fawn?
CONSCIOUS MOVEMENT
Use music, or dance to explore and express your shadow self. This can help you to express emotions that you might not be able to put into words.
MINDFULNESS & MEDITATION
VISUALIZE your shadow and the parts of yourself that you find difficult to accept.. Imagine yourself engaging in a dialogue with it.
BREATHE into your belly by noticing the breath rising and falling in your abdomen, especially the low belly. You may need to consciously let go of tension in the belly to really feel the breath move in and out. Many of us hold tension there, especially when we are upset or stressed.
BE honest about your shadow thoughts and fears. If you are afraid of something, ask yourself if you can be OK with that happening. Can you trust the Universe? Can you offer the situation to your Higher Self or the Divine?
NOTICE your inner responses, thoughts and feelings when you are triggered or have a reaction to an external stimulus or situation.
When you judge, criticize or blame someone else, ask yourself "what am i avoiding in myself?"
When you feel jealous or anger, ask yourself "What core belief is under here?"
IDENTIFY where you feel it in your body, especially any constrictions.
HONOR your feelings without judgment or further reaction. Neither try to push them away, nor engage in thoughts, words or actions that build upon them. Simply observe and allow the emotional energy to move through you. Continue to breathe. Speak to the feelings, if that feels comfortable to you.
ASK yourself if the thoughts you have been telling yourself about this emotion and this situation are really true?
PAUSE and reflect further. Can you step back and see if there is a larger message that is available to you? Messages are available in any situation, particularly those we are triggered by. We only need to pay attention. These messages can come from our body, our environment, song lyrics, animals, etc. In fact, repeating situations themselves can be seen as messages that something within us is asking for attention and healing.
"The more you've experienced the darkness, once you finally let go, that much farther and faster will you fly into the light."
Bashar
ACCEPTANCE & PATIENCE
PRACTICE seeing yourself in others as a way to cultivate loving compassion and self-compassion,
FORGIVE others involved in your pain. Acknowledge that we all are learning and making mistakes
ACCEPT the wounded parts of yourself and others and acknowledge that we all feel hurt in some way. Love and accept yourself as who you are, with all your perceived flaws and imperfections. You are perfect and more than enough in the eyes of the divine!
WAIT in wonder. Take your time, moving at your own pace. It is ongoing, sometimes lifelong work to heal and protect your heart. We don't know what we don't know. Keep on evolving, learning and growing.
"You must become your own Creator. If you want to create yourself then you do not begin with the best and highest, but with the worst and deepest."
Carl Jung
The Fruits of Your Labor
Shadow Work can be challenging and uncomfortable as its happening, but it is extremely rewarding and worthwhile work longeterm. The more committed you are to this process, the better you will understand yourself and your own place in the Universe.
The best part? As we heal and develop understanding and compassion for the many aspects of ourselves, we find that we have the same for others too. And that only amplifies positive energy outward to the greater good.
Outcomes, rewards and positive indicators of doing Shadow Work include
You have a greater confidence in your true self and your purpose
You feel deeper feelings of love, acceptance and understanding
You're not easily offended or triggered - you can laugh at yourself
You see and appreciate multiple perspectives
You're aware of your flaws or emotions but not ashamed of them
You're assertive and direct but still polite with your boundaries and communication
You confront unknowns, adversity and setbacks with courage, grace and poise
You recognize a part of yourself in everyone you meet
Your empathy, understanding and compassion has increased, so you rarely judge others choices or behaviors
Your relationships are improved
Your creativity is boosted
You have an awareness of your toxic patterns, problems and traumas
You're less likely to project unresolved issues and conflict onto others
The best part of Shadow Work is that the benefits ripple outward and have positive effects and healing on the Collective.
"The best thing you can do for Mother Earth is to heal yourselves because she is a reflection of you."
Wendy Kennedy
This is because when more people become aware of their own struggles and vulnerabilities, they become more understanding and empathic towards others' struggles. This means less conflict and misunderstanding overall, contributing to more connected relationships within our communities.
Furthermore, individuals who have engaged in shadow work are more likely to lead with integrity and authenticity, inspiring others to do the same.
By collectively embracing our shadows and addressing societal issues, we can work towards positive cultural and social transformation, creating a happier healthier world with greater inclusivity, equality, and compassion.
Everything we shut our eyes to, everything we run away from, everything we deny, denigrate, or despise, serves to defeat us in the end. What seems nasty, painful, evil, can become a source of beauty, joy, and strength, if faced with an open mind.
Henry Miller
In a nutshell there are essentially two different contexts from which to operate:
SURVIVAL MODE- focus on protection and safety, fixed mindset, focusing externally, blaming others for circumstances or emotions
SOURCE MODE - focus on creativity and connection, growth mindset, focusing internally, taking radical responsibility for all parts of self and life
Which vibration do YOU want to live from?
“The heat of transformation is unbearable, yet change is necessary. It burns up the useless, the diseased. Generation after generation, I create myself. It is never easy. Long nights I waited, lost in myself, considering the stars. I wage a battle against darkness, against my own ignorance, my resistance to change, my sentimental love for my own folly.”
Egyptian Book of the Dead
It can be devastating when the Dark finally latches on to the unhealed parts of you. To really embrace a journey of awakening and healing you must start at the root and work your way up. You must
feel the emotions and sit in the chaos until peace arrives.
be able to “channel”, tune in, or to be quiet or still enough to hear spirit
be able to equally question, and accept, the mysteries of the universe
be ok with solitude
lean into divinity and allow spirit to guide you
In other words, in order to interpret the dark from the light, one must know themselves and be at peace with themselves. These are the basics and yet these are what make often make us the most uncomfortable.
Like the lotus flower that blooms from mud, we must honor the messy, most painful parts of ourselves and our human experience. It is the darkest parts that allow us to birth our most divine nature and to achieve and appreciate the beautiful future. This is the ultimate gift of the Shadow.
Want to explore your Shadow more? I offer various modalities including Feng Shui, Human Design and Reiki which can support you in your process. I look forward to connecting soon.
Eluxoroma (n.): the devotion to positive spiritual growth in the midst of underlying chaos or darkness
Erin is a certified feng shui consultant, energy healer, wellness coach and holistic growth strategist.
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